(Originally posted 4/17/2017)
I’ve done the math. God is good.
Mary posted recently about how magical it was to raise 4 kids and the blessing it was to get them all ready on Easter Sunday morning. There was stress and confusion and chaos but was all very sweet too.
What I remember is the amazing way our very small, very limited, very tight budget would be stretched to its ultimate limit at every holiday. The money that we had that barely was enough to feed and clothe and house us would get asked to also help us celebrate.
That’s not entirely accurate, we believe now and believed then that everything we have comes from our father, our Heavenly Father. So we would ask him to provide so we could bless our kids and he always did. God always provided and yet I always worried.
Matthew 15 has Jesus providing healing and food for those he cared about, the multitudes.
“29 Jesus left there and went along the Sea of Galilee. Then he went up on a mountainside and sat down. 30 Great crowds came to him, bringing the lame, the blind, the crippled, the mute and many others, and laid them at his feet; and he healed them. 31 The people were amazed when they saw the mute speaking, the crippled made well, the lame walking and the blind seeing. And they praised the God of Israel.
32 Jesus called his disciples to him and said, “I have compassion for these people; they have already been with me three days and have nothing to eat. I do not want to send them away hungry, or they may collapse on the way.”
33 His disciples answered, “Where could we get enough bread in this remote place to feed such a crowd?”
34 “How many loaves do you have?” Jesus asked.
“Seven,” they replied, “and a few small fish.”
35 He told the crowd to sit down on the ground. 36 Then he took the seven loaves and the fish, and when he had given thanks, he broke them and gave them to the disciples, and they in turn to the people. 37 They all ate and were satisfied. Afterward the disciples picked up seven basketfuls of broken pieces that were left over. 38 The number of those who ate was four thousand men, besides women and children. 39 After Jesus had sent the crowd away, he got into the boat and went to the vicinity of Magadan.”
If I did the math correctly, by noon today I will make what I used to make per week at my first job that I had raising four kids. Part of that is inflation. All of that is God’s provision. And yet I am worried. What will it take for me to learn to trust God’s provision? I don’t know.
Father God forgive my fearful, doubtful heart ❤️. Thank you for providing for me and my family. Thank you most for sending Jesus to die in my place, to pay a debt I could never pay, and for bringing him back to life to show me that there is more to life than life here. There is a life with you. Thank you.